Over the last few years and few minutes, I have come up with 20 quotes that you can use for humour, inspiration, motivation, or nothing at all. Feel free to give me credit if you steal them. Or not. Your choice! If some of these quotes already exist, or some variation of them exist, I had no idea. Don’t yell at me.

If you can’t knock their socks off, they’re already barefoot.

They say if you’re not first, you’re last. Then why do they have a podium at the Olympics?

You can’t force someone to apologize to you.

Everyone is always after the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, but how are we supposed to know which end of the rainbow it’s at?

Google will always be there for you, except when you’re writing an exam.

Keep your friends close and your enemies on Facebook.

When the music stops, sit down.

If you come to a fork in the road, make sure it doesn’t slash your tires.

Never talk about someone behind their back, they’ll probably hear you.

Don’t be intimidated by others. They flip their pillow over to the cold side just like you do.

There is no such thing as a stupid question. Just kidding.

When life gives you ice, go skating.

If you’re lost, find yourself, and then find what you’re looking for.

Life is a team sport.

Friends are like a sandwich. If you put too many things in the bun, eventually some fall out.

Yesterday prepares you for today which prepares you for tomorrow.

Everyone has to venture off on their own eventually. Bananas call this a “banana split.” Humans call this “moving out.”

Life is hard; sit on a couch.

Never throw in the towel, you’ll need it to wipe the sweat from all your hard work.

If you can’t remember something, it’s not important.


About Paul

This is the part where I'm supposed to write something interesting about myself and you'll read it and think, "That's not that interesting." So let's not do that and just think about pizza instead, on the count of three. One, two, three. Donuts. Now, wasn't that interesting?
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39 Responses to 20 Quotes

  1. Little Rants says:

    Awesome! More please?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Barb Knowles says:

    Flipping the pillow did it. Now I have to go back and keep reading.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Barb Knowles says:

    This was great. My husband closed the doors. My favorites after the pillow? Facebook, rainbow, music but the best of ALL….there is no stupid question!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. sltaylor1206 says:

    I love your quotes.
    However, what if the person that you need to apologize to is yourself? How does one force themselves to apologize to their own self?

    If that makese any sense. Now I must change my music because the U2 album that got put on my iPhone is playing -_-

    Liked by 1 person

    • Paul says:

      Hey! I just read your second blog post and was about to comment. To answer your question, to apologize to yourself you need to forgive yourself. You have to realize that the things that happened in the past, happened in the past. Every day is a new opportunity to change and be better than you were the day before. I hope that answered it?

      Oh man, I cringe too ever time I come across those songs on my phone too.


  5. Steve Martin once said the last one. “I can’t remember something, but I guess it wasn’t very important. Oh now I remember,.. I’m radioactive!”


  6. shubhada says:

    Haha, these quotes are really good!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Lyndsi says:

    These are great! The music quote is great and the banana split one is hilarious.


  8. Lol I don’t know why but the quote “when the music stops, sit down” made me laugh out loud. Don’t get me wrong, it’s clever. But I’m not sure of it was thatttt funny. Loved it though 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Paul says:

      Haha you’re not the first one who laughed at that one. I also thought it was clever but definitely not the strongest of the bunch. Thanks for keeping me humble!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Haha anytime! I probably loved it so much because I love to dance! Not that I’m a “dancer” or good or anything, but I’m definitely the one of my friend bunch going crazy on the dance floor when we go out 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • Paul says:

        Well in that case keep dancing after the music stops…unless they kick you out or you’re playing musical chairs! I can’t dance and I just gave dancing advice haha

        Liked by 1 person

      • Haha musical chairs! Man, haven’t played that in a million years… and I always welcome dance advice! I’ll probs just stick to my instincts- if the song’s still going hard in my head then I shall continue the party haha

        Liked by 1 person

      • Paul says:

        Growing up in the 90s, musical chairs was a hit at birthday parties! It needs to make a comeback. Solid strategy, and if anyone questions it just say the soundtrack in your head is on repeat.

        Liked by 1 person

      • OMG the 90s… I’m turning 25 on the 14th and I feel so old haha But yes, musically chairs was a favorite of mine. I was always one of the quicker ones! Oh and I lovedddd pinatas!

        Liked by 1 person

      • Paul says:

        I’m turning 24 in September and feel like an old man. How did we get so old so fast? Pinatas! And ring toss. And water balloon toss. And simon says. Kids these days don’t know what they’re missing out on.

        Liked by 1 person

      • LOL I’m half Filipino, so I was literally told just yesterday I look like I’m 18… so! I feel old, but look like a high schooler still haha And yesss- kids these days! At the club I teach at they ask for Ubers and go to the Hamptons every weekend… and they act like little, drunk, silly midgets haha kids are crazy.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Paul says:

        Well at least 18 is close enough to being considered an adult? It could be worse. That “how old are you” website that was a fad 3 days ago told me I’m 35 so I have that to deal with… Oh my, kids are so high maintenance these days. I’m probably going back to work at a camp this summer…they already have cellphones at age 10! TEN!


      • Very true, could be worse. And ohh wow, that what that was! I didn’t get in to that… I wonder what my age would be though… 10? 20? 40? Could go either way lol and tell me about it! I didn’t get my first phone until high school. and it was like a big stupid brick.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Paul says:

        Same! With an antenna to pull up every time you phoned someone. Ohh the good ‘ol days.

        Liked by 1 person

      • YES! A classic flip-open-brick of a phone!

        Liked by 1 person

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