Tag Archives: Humour

F1: Drive To Survive

Posted on March 17, 2019 by

It’s nine o’clock (and 56 minutes) on a Saturday, and I have three hours to kill before the first race of the Formula One season takes place in Melbourne, Australia. Could I record it and watch it in the morning? … Continue reading →

Posted in Sports | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 15 Comments

‘Twas The Night Before Qualifying

Posted on March 15, 2019 by

‘Twas the night before qualifying, when all through the track Not a driver was steering, not even a Williams alone at the back The tires were put on the cars with care In hopes that qualifying would soon be there … Continue reading →

Posted in Poetry, Sports | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Viewing Notes: The Bachelor (Colton) – Finale Pt. 2

Posted on March 13, 2019 by

This is the show that never ends, but tonight it does. I’d like to welcome back Cass for the final time this season. Her thoughts will be in bold. Sorry I went MIA last night everyone, I was just in … Continue reading →

Posted in TV | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Viewing Notes: The Bachelor (Colton) – Finale Pt. 1

Posted on March 12, 2019 by

Of course this show has a two-part season finale. Of course. ~ We kick things off with Chris Harrison in front of a studio audience. ~ He asks rhetorical questions like, “Will Colton come back to the show?” and “Will … Continue reading →

Posted in TV | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

About Time

Posted on March 8, 2019 by

The older I get, the faster time moves. It’s not fair, but there’s nothing I can do about it. I can’t start a petition. I can’t create a union and call for a strike. I’d file an injunction, but that … Continue reading →

Posted in Life | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 30 Comments

Aaron’s Surprise Birthday Party

Posted on March 6, 2019 by

SURPRISE! We, here at The Captain’s Speech, like to make dreams come true. On January 10, Aaron from The Confusing Middle posted a list of 100 random facts about himself. Here are two facts that stood out to me. Fact … Continue reading →

Posted in Random | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 27 Comments

Viewing Notes: The Bachelor (Colton) – Ep. 9

Posted on March 5, 2019 by

The Colton jumped the fence, the Colton jumped the fence, hi-ho, the derry-o, the Colton jumped the fence. Welcome back to another edition of your favourite Bachelor recap. I’m Paul and this Cass. Her thoughts will be in bold, so you … Continue reading →

Posted in TV | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Viewing Notes: The Bachelor (Colton) – Ep. 8

Posted on February 26, 2019 by

They started as strangers. And then they kissed. And then they travelled the world, without eating any food. How did it end up like this? And then Demi went home. Moment of silence for Dem-Dem. It was only a kiss, … Continue reading →

Posted in TV | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

Viewing Notes: The Bachelor (Colton) – Ep. 7

Posted on February 19, 2019 by

According to The Good Place, if you watch The Bachelor, you’re going to hell. They have no motive to lie, so it must be true. Not sure what that means for those of you who watch the show via these … Continue reading →

Posted in TV | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Viewing Notes: The Bachelor (Colton) – Ep. 6

Posted on February 12, 2019 by

Hello. Welcome to the most outrageous episode in Bachelor history. I’m Paul and this is my friend, Cass. Her thoughts will be in bold, while mine will be in dismay. Please enjoy, and remember to weep not for the memories. … Continue reading →

Posted in TV | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments