We are down to the Final Four on this season of The Bachelor, which means it’s time for Peter to meet the families of the individuals who applied to be on a dating show.
Still hoping to be picked in the end are: Hannah Ann, Kelsey, Madison, and Victoria F.
HANNAH ANN’S HOMETOWN DATE (Knoxville, Tennessee)
~ Hannah Ann is holding an umbrella as she waits for Peter, but as soon as he arrives, she drops it on the sidewalk and jumps in his arms.
~ They’re walking away. She left the umbrella on the ground! So did Peter! Is this considered littering? Those umbrellas had a family!
~ Hannah Ann’s dad is known as Ranger Rick. He’s always said that she needs a “tough man” so before Peter meets him, they’re going axe throwing.
~ Can’t wait until Peter tells Ranger Rick that he banged his head on a golf cart.
~ Peter and Hannah Ann aren’t having much luck with axe throwing, until Peter hits a bullseye and she jumps in his arms.
~ Peter wrote her a letter called, “Things I Love About You!”
~ Peter, this isn’t a letter. It’s a list. IT’S A LIST. Oh my goodness.
~ One of the things he loves about her is that she has a name for every dress she’s worn. She does?
MEETING THE FAMILY
~ Ranger Rick (Dad) refers to her as Hannah (TWICE!), which is proof she’s going by Hannah Ann on the show just to differentiate from Hannah Brown.
~ Ranger Rick is giving off “I’m ready to get this camera crew out of my house” vibes and I love it.
~ Hannah Ann and her sister have a chat. They both cry.
~ Her mom warns Peter that her husband is very guarded and won’t just give Hannah Ann away to anybody. I certainly hope not.
~ Ranger Rick is rocking a fleece vest over a button up shirt. It’s a look that says, “I want to be warm, but not too warm.” I respect it.
~ Peter tells him he’s falling in love with his daughter and Rick says he wasn’t expecting that. Poor guy, he’s never watched the show. Probably for the best.
~ “Do not say that word to her unless you wholeheartedly…that’s what you mean and that’s what you’re gonna do.” – Ranger Rick, referring to the word “love”
~ The night is over and Peter and Hannah Ann convene on the front porch. Or is this more of a veranda?
~ Either way, Hannah Ann is wearing a jacket (on camera) for the first time today.
KELSEY’S HOMETOWN DATE (Des Moines, Iowa)
~ “I really like him.”
~ Why does it feel like they’re always going to Iowa on this show?
~ They’re off to stomp grapes with their bare feet and I just realized why cheese is normally paired with wine.
~ Time to make their own brand of wine at the winery and Peter is attempting to describe their relationship, as if it were a wine.
~ Their bottle is called, “The Wine” because creativity is not their thing.
~ Kelsey tells Peter that she’s in love with him.
MEETING THE FAMILY
~ The family is serving crab rangoon and Peter is freaking out because he’s never had them before.
~ He tries one and says, “I’m a fan.”
~ That means he hates them. If you really like a food, you say they’re delicious. You don’t say, “I’m a fan.”
~ Kelsey’s sister says it’s a big deal that she brought a boy home. I feel like it would be a bigger deal if it wasn’t a mandatory thing that happens when you make it to the Final Four.
~ Peter’s mom says he walked through the door and he “entered easily”.
~ “I’m good at walking through doors.” – Peter should’ve said this
~ She tells him not to break Kelsey’s heart. “Do you understand?”
~ Oh, how I wish she would’ve thrown a “Comprender?” at him, instead.
~ Kelsey’s mom tells Kelsey she’ll love her “forever and always”. Somebody’s been listening to T. Swift lately.
~ Me. It’s me.
~ Peter and Kelsey now sit on the front porch (or is it a veranda?) and talk and kiss and all that stuff.
MADISON’S HOMETOWN DATE (Auburn, Alabama)
~ Just like Iowa, this show is always in Alabama.
~ Madison’s dad coaches basketball at Auburn University. There’s a statue of Sir Charles Barkley outside, as there should be.
~ She teaches him a War Eagles cheer.
~ Peter and Madison walk onto the court at Auburn and a video of CHARLES BARKLEY plays on the video board.
~ That is one crossover I never expected. Get it, “crossover”? It’s a basketball term. Ugh.
~ Out comes the Head Coach of Auburn’s Men’s Basketball Team, Bruce Pearl, and he watches as Madison walks Peter through some dribbling drills.
~ I like how there’s black tape on the balls to block off a logo. Probably the NCAA.
~ Time for a one-on-one game and Madison is going to win because we’ve seen Peter play basketball with Victoria F. and he wasn’t very good.
~ Madison wins, 5-3.
MEETING THE FAMILY
~ The front walkway has been watered. I didn’t know they were Italian! (This is a layered joke).
~ Before they eat, everyone has to say something nice about Madison.
~ I want to be a
fly on the wall person on the couch, when the producers tell each family to give a toast before eating. I want to see the panic on their faces like, “We don’t do that here. What do we say?”
~ The food is a prop! They don’t even pick up a fork and Madison’s mom is already stealing her away to talk.
~ Madison’s mom says it takes time with her and that’s one thing she hasn’t had.
~ This conversation has appeared on every hometown date episode since 1934.
~ Madison says she hasn’t fully told Peter how she views intimacy.
~ I like Madison, but feel bad that she’s on this show. She doesn’t need it.
~ Peter tells her dad that he’s falling in love with Madison. He wonders if they’re compatible.
~ Peter says he’s willing to “put the work in”. He’s using sports talk. The dad is too smart and isn’t buying it.
~ Her dad is being very honest with Peter Pilot. You can hear the skepticism in his voice, but he’s not completely shutting the door on this whole thing because he knows how Madison feels.
~ What a good dad. If Auburn is on my March Madness bracket this year, I might just have to pencil them in to win a round or two.
~ Just looked it up – Auburn has a 22-3 record. They’re going to the Sweet Sixteen, calling it now.
~ Peter and Madison meet up on the front porch (OR IS IT A VERANDA?).
~ It’s amazing that each family has had a bench outside their front door.
~ Side note: Some of the hometown dates are filmed at a house that the show rents, rather than the actual home the family lives in.
VICTORIA’S HOMETOWN DATE (Virginia Beach, Virginia)
~ “Our dates just haven’t been easy.” – Victoria F.
~ No, they have not.
~ They’re going for a walk on the beach with Victoria’s dog.
~ Now they pull up to an “Old Time Photos” place where they put on clothes from yesteryear. Are dogs allowed in there or are they breaking the rules?
~ Peter: “We’re in the state of love, so hopefully today could be a big day for us.”
IT’S THE SAME PLACE
~ They’re sitting on a pier by the beach and it’s reminding me of Lauren’s hometown date with Arie. I have no clue how or why this memory is in my head. No chance it’s the same place, right?
~ I’m looking this up.
~ LAUREN IS FROM VIRGINIA BEACH.
~ There’s a YouTube video of Lauren and Arie’s date and it looks like Peter and Victoria are sitting at the exact same table, on the exact same pier, as they did.
~ Seriously, the EXACT TABLE.
~ I’m a genius for noticing this! A GENIUS.
~ And no one cares. Blogging really is a lonely hobby.
BACK TO THE SHOW
~ Victoria surprises him with a Hunter Hayes concert. Everyone at the concert films them because why enjoy the music?
~ Peter and Victoria go separate ways to prepare for the evening, when a woman calls out to Peter.
~ Peter recognizes her as a woman named, Merissa. Her face is blurred out. They seem to know each other.
~ She warns him to “be careful” and says he doesn’t deserve what he’s on a date with right now.
~ SHE KNOWS VICTORIA.
~ “There’s been many relationships broken off because of her.” – Merissa
~ Sounds like Merissa used to date Peter.
~ This brief conversation by an ATM machine is going to light up the internet.
MEETING THE FAMILY, MAYBE
~ Peter is now meeting Victoria at her house, but he looks like someone just knocked a pizza slice out of his hands.
~ Victoria senses something is wrong. They take a seat on the steps outside her house. No bench this time.
~ He says she had an ex at their first concert and today he had an ex at their second concert.
~ These two need to stop attending concerts together. It’s like when Jessica Fletcher leaves the house. Bad things happen.
~ Peter says, Merissa said Victoria causes a lot of relationships to end. Victoria’s eyes widen.
~ “I’m, like, just disgusted right now.” – V for Vendetta
~ Victoria doesn’t want to do this. Peter wants the truth and she said it doesn’t matter.
~ “You’re supposed to meet my family tonight and you decided that what Merissa told you is more important.”
~ FIGHT. THEY’RE HAVING A FIGHT.
~ Peter says he feels like she doesn’t fight for their relationship. She doesn’t agree. He’s basically laying out how difficult she’s been this whole season.
~ “I am so done with this conversation right now.” – Victoria
~ Victoria walks down the street, crying. The cameraman slowly trails behind.
~ I hope her family is watching from the window. Ohhh maybe the neighbours are!
~ Victoria comes back and says she was going to tell him she’s falling in love with him, but how’s she supposed to do that now?
~ She doesn’t understand that Peter had an obligation to address this.
~ She’s mad that he brought this up before meeting her family.
~ They hug and Peter leaves before ever going inside. Did they break up?
~ DINNER IS RUINED.
~ Her family finally comes outside to see what the commotion was about.
~ Peter has woken up feeling horrible and confused because – say it with me now – he is perpetually confused.
~ He gets a knock at the door and it’s the pizza delivery man! Nah, just kidding. It’s Victoria.
~ Time for a chat on the couch. This better not be like the Arie and Becca chat.
~ I really can’t handle another breakup on this show happening in front of throw pillows.
~ Peter feels like she doesn’t want him to love her the way he wants to love her.
~ “We have no communication skill.” – Peter
~ DING DING DING.
~ Peter says its frustrating for him to invest in her when she could just walk away.
~ Victoria says she’s trying really hard – she’s never tried like this – and can’t walk away from him.
~ “But you kinda do (walk away from me).” – Peter
~ Victoria says the decision is up to him but she can’t let him leave without knowing that she’s falling in love with him.
~ He’s not making a decision right now.
~ Peter tells us he sees the potential with Victoria even though he didn’t meet her parents.
~ Chris Harrison is at an airplane hangar to greet the women.
~ Madison arrives first. She’s punctual.
~ Hannah Ann is next and she feels anxious.
~ Kelsey is there.
~ Victoria arrived and tells Chris she doesn’t know what’s going to happen tonight.
~ Peter gives a speech about how it was great to meet their families. Victoria looks perturbed.
~ Hannah Ann gets the first rose.
~ Madison gets the second rose. Yes!
~ VICTORIA IS GETTING THE FINAL ROSE.
~ Just wait until Kelsey realizes he didn’t even meet her family.
~ Kelsey and Victoria both wore green dresses. Fitting that only one of them could stay, I guess?
~ Peter walks Kelsey out. She didn’t see this coming at all. She’s in shock.
~ He says it meant the world to him when she said she loved him, but “he wasn’t there.”
~ Time for her to go in a limo.
~ She’s shocked and confused.
BACK IN THE HANGAR
~ Peter informs the women that they’re off to Gold Coast, Australia. They must be exhausted from all this travel.
~ Next week will feature three overnight dates and Madison is really struggling with this because she refuses to compromise her values.
~ Peter doesn’t really know that yet, so as he’s walking out, she goes after him to “talk for a second.”
Next week’s episode is going to break the internet, so bring tape. See you then!
As always, let me know your thoughts on the show down below. I don’t even know what discussion topics to ask because the whole show is one big question mark at this point.