1. People get so excited for “Patio Szn” and “Wedding Szn”. I’m thinking of creating a new “Szn” called “Bedding Szn”. Basically, we just nap. Who’s in?
2. The uppercase letter “G” is my least favourite letter to write.
3. I draw the number 6 starting from inside the loop. Apparently this is abnormal?
4. Riverdale is getting a bit hokey, isn’t it?
5. Italy didn’t qualify for the World Cup which means I don’t have to pretend to like soccer next year. Phew.
6. Carol from The Walking Dead is the best. I want to be her friend. Don’t know what we’d talk about, but I won’t be bitten by a zombie under her watch, so that’s good.
7. Imagine the plural of “Goose” was “Gaase”.
8. Is Santa Claus related to Santa Barbara?
9. To the non-Canadians reading this who have never been introduced to All Dressed chips, you are missing out.
10. Can we go just one Wednesday without someone mentioning that it’s “Hump Day”? You don’t think we know by now?
11. Onion rings are the worst.
12. Scalloped potatoes are also the worst.
13. I hope the wrestling business gets to a point where talent can roam freely from company to company.
14. I’ve had six matchups so far in my fantasy hockey season. Of which, I have three ties. THREE. It’s killing me slowly.
15. In the song, “Stroke Me” by The Squire, I always thought the lyrics were, “Something’s cooking” but they are actually, “Stroke me, stroke me.”
15.5 I’ve been meaning to mention this one since August 2016 but never knew how to just throw it in a blog post without it being weird.
16. Advertisements on YouTube videos are a waste of time and money, let’s be honest.
17. Shout-out to Catherine at One Big Stressball. She can read my mind. And you should read her blog.
18. If you haven’t watched Last Chance U on Netflix, you probably should. Unless you don’t like football, or documentaries, or football documentaries. But it’s a good show! Watch it. Tell them Paul sent you.
18.5 They have no clue who I am.
18.75 Who would you even tell? It’s Netflix.
19. I don’t know who invented the couch, but they’re a genius.
20. People who wear their socks to sleep are probably the same people who are okay with sleeping with the door open.
20.5 Please leave a comment below telling me you wear your socks to bed, but would never leave the door open. I’m hoping to get at least 7 comments like this.
21. Ever since I wrote a rant complaining about my iPhone battery, it’s been lasting longer. A few weeks ago, it went 40 hours between charges. That is a modern day record in my age bracket.
22. Eenie meenie miney mo (is this english?), catch a tiger by the toe (hell no), if he hollers let him go (no kidding), eenie meenie miney mo (french?). Not because you’re dirty (phew), not because you’re clean (sniffs armpits), just because you kissed a girl behind a magazine (but the magazine was blocking…). So out you go come back tomorrow (see ya then). Repeat x10
22.5 And that’s how we decided who was “it” for tag back in elementary school.
23. When we say numbers out loud, most of them are just a combination of two numbers. “Twenty” and “three” is known as twenty-three. Why didn’t they get a couples name, like people do? Like, “Twenree”.
24. Twour.
25. Twive.
26. TWIX (are for kids).
27. That last thought was a pun, a chocolate, a joke, and a Halloween reference. I only needed four words to do it. Bow down in awe.
28. I’ve never been in a hammock. I don’t think I’d ever get off if I were to ever get on.
29. Clearest Blue by Chvrches is really good.
30. I want a new hobby. Something small and simple and beneficial. Last year my “new hobby” was solving Sudoku puzzles. The year before that, it was donuts.
31. Shouldn’t there be another “n” on the end of “banana” just to make it even with the letter “a”? Let’s start a petition.
31.5 Pronounced: “Buh-nan-nan”.
31.75 Try getting that out of your head.
32. I’m just here to make the world a more observant place. And if no one notices me, I’ll have proven that my cause is worthy.
33. The people I follow on Twitter aren’t as funny with 280 characters. Someone tell them.
34. When I picture animals on a farm arranging a social event, I picture a planning committee with one of each animal. And when they go around suggesting events, the cow always says “Moooovie Night” and everyone else rolls their eyes because it’s like, “Really Bessy, movie night again?” And then there is just a lot of resentment and anger and they reluctantly settle on board games night, which no one really wants, but everyone agrees on because it’s simple.
35. What if shadows didn’t exist?
36. I was honoured and humbled to have my post about Roy Halladay featured on WordPress Discover last week.
37. I was going to say that nothing rhymes with “country” but then I realized that “one tree” rhymes with country, so this thought is now moooooot.
37.5 Sorry. Bessy got loose.
38. Why can’t we all agree to not drive like maniacs?
39. If fish live in a fish tank, does that mean humans live in a human house?
40. I’ve been trying to find the right time to start season two of Stranger Things, but haven’t found it yet.
41. I have a tendency to overplay the same song for a week and then scramble to find a new song to fill the void. There is nothing worse than not being able to find that new song.
42. None of my favourite celebrities have been outed as disgusting human beings. Then again, Jerry Seinfeld and Kristen Bell are the only two I care about.
43. I’m about to watch Part 2 of the Elizabeth Smart documentary on A&E. Kudos to her for telling her story. Part 1 was startling, to say the least. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, Google her name.
44. In 5-10 years, we’ll probably have to use our eyes to unlock our iPhone. That’ll be a heck of a marketing campaign. They’ll probably rename it the iiPhone.
44.5 Get it? Because we have two eyes? I’m sorry. So, so sorry.
45. Why be Cookie Monster for Halloween when you can be Cookie Monster every day?
46. Who here watches Survivor? I tried to do viewing notes for the show like I do with The Bachelor, but I realized I enjoy the show too much to be distracted by a computer screen (and the witty comments in my head) the whole time.
47. Woodchucks are only famous because of a long, drawn out, hypothetical question. What a life.
48. The phrase “bear with me” is so strange. “Pig with me” I could understand. It means you want someone to eat with you. But, “bear”?
48.5 And if you use “bare” by accident, then you’re in trouble.
49. Things I Don’t Like #476: When Person X asks Person Y a question and Person Y doesn’t give an answer, but instead, belittles Person X for not already knowing the answer. Can we cut that nonsense out of our daily life? If someone asks you a question, answer it. I don’t care if it’s a stupid question.
50. We can dance if we want to. We can leave your friends behind. Cause your friends don’t dance, and if they don’t dance, well they’re no friends of mine. We can dance, we can dance, everybody look at your hands.
That song has been the first thing in my head each morning for the last two weeks. Why?
Thanks for the shoutout, man! If Bessy ever gets out again may I borrow her? She sounds like a hoot! Also you’ve just got Safety Dance in my head and I cannot get rid of it.
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You’re welcome! The owls also think Bessy’s a hoot, you can borrow her whenever. And isn’t that just the worst song to have in your head? I was hoping by writing it out I’d be able to pass it off to someone. Looks like you’re the lucky winner!
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I sleep without socks and the door shut tight! So it’s totally a thing that people are opposite, but honestly have no idea why 💁🏼 hahahah also, I had no idea you watched Riverdale?!? 😍
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Exactly! That’s how I came to the conclusion about socks and the door being open. And yes, I watch Riverdale. The town is in a perpetual state of fog and power saving mode. And the “high school kids” don’t even seem to know what an “awkward phase” is. They went straight to adulthood lol.
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That’s what happens when you hire beautiful 20 something year olds to play teens 😂 I’m kind of in love with the show though, but probably just because of jughead and Betty tbh – the latest episode broke my heart 😭 have you been liking it or not so much? 😊
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I have been liking it! I think the cast is great. It’s just some things are a bit too unrealistic for me. Like that whole thing where Archie filmed that video and then the high school basically turned into a cult with t-shirts? That doesn’t happen in real life haha.
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I get what you mean! I watch it for its aesthetic value and casting 😊
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Don’t have the time to read the whole thing right now but I’m just here to tell you I sleep with socks on and would NEVER sleep with the door open. Don’t have time to count other comments but I hope it number 7.
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*I’m
Wow Rosie, stop procrastinating, you’re doing it badly
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Haha actually, you’re number 1! But it’s still early. Thanks for the feedback and your commitment to procrastination!
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bananan is never leaving my head omg
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You’re welcome! Hahah
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We do need ship names for numbers!!! Aahhhhh
I think donuts should be my new hobby… #anothergreatPaulidea
Congrats on Discover again!!
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Thank you! Donuts is a great hobby! They are also a great friend. 2 for the price of 1 sorta deal.
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I started off thinking I’d just reply to some of the numbers but then realized that would mean posting a novel in your comments and I’m not going to be *that* person. So instead a question and a statement:
How does this 50 thoughts thing come to be – do you do it all at once or keep a log until you have 50 but it’s not really 50 because you throw in .5’s and .75’s in there as well.
And also: thanks for getting that song stuck in my head from #50….it shall be there all day…*cries a little on the inside, tries to find a different song to have on auto-reply*
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I’ll write a few thoughts down on my phone, but it’s never more than about 6-7 before I start writing this post. The majority of them are just things I think of on the spot. Scary, huh?
I have no regrets getting the song stuck in your head. Finally other people will feel my pain!
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Lol I have one of those files too.
And dang it, Paul! I’m seriously going to have to listen to Ice Cube or Hanson to get it out. Mmmmm bop….bop bop doo op….🎶
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Don’t you dare start spewing that mmmmm bop around these parts! That is the all time worst song to get stuck in my head. NO.
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You started it! I can’t be held responsible for my actions but can I offer you an “oops i did it again” or “bye bye bye” instead?
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I know what you’re trying to do and it’s not gonna work! You know why? Because I’m blue da ba dee da ba die. That’s why!
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Are you sure you’re not just a barbie girl? Living in a barbie world?
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Hmm life in plastic? It’s fantastic. You can brush my hair…NO NO
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Lol! Just shake it off!
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This is done. T Swift has too many songs.
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Haha fair enough!
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1. I agree wholeheartedly! I could use one right now.
2. Cursive L is the best and print G is the runner up.
8. Maybe that’s Mrs. Clause?
11. Shot through the heart
20/20.5. I wear socks to bed most of the time if not all the time. I also leave my door closed even though in the summer it makes my room as hot as a sauna (plus I have a dog that likes to chew on anything on my bedroom floor or get in my trashcan).
23-27. That just made my day!
28. If you get on a hammock, get on it alone! Don’t let anyone else on with you.
32. Woah.
40. I don’t get the hype with Stranger Things.
41. OMFISH! (That’s just a phrase I came up with a while ago. Don’t mind me) Yes!!! It took me forever to find that new song. Right now it’s My Heart Will Go On by everyone knows this song and who it’s by (I know that song came out forever ago but I don’t care).
49. Ugh
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Oh yeah, in the summer sleeping with my door fully closed is awful. My room is a sauna x10.
The cursive letter L is fun to do, I just don’t have any opportunities to do it.
Also, I have no intentions of sharing a hammock haha that is MY relaxation time lol.
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15.5! Hahahhaha!! I sleep with my socks on and the door open because I am cold and my cat is a jerk that can’t emotionally handle a closed door.
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I knew it! I knew it was a thing! I’m going to ignore your cat comment because it detracts from what I said lol
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16. Agreed
40. It’s always the right time.
49. Yes! Google doesn’t judge me when I ask questions! Why should a human being who calls herself my friend be any different!
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Haha this just gave me the terrible thought of, what if Google did get snippy with us when we ask it something stupid. The Internet would die that day.
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Google’s response to a given question: Look it up.
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😂😂
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These are hilarious 🙂
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Thank you!
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20.6 I don’t wear socks to bed, and I keep the door closed.
20.7 The wife and I now have separate rooms, ’cause she snores and I wear a Darth Vader air mask. Great Post!
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Thanks! No socks and the door closed is the way to go!
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1. I’m in like Flynn (who the heck is Flynn & why does everyone assume he/she is “in??”)!
2. Do you mean in cursive or print or both? I can’t do an uppercase “G” in cursive. 😦
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Uppercase G in print. Every time I write it, it looks different. Almost as if my pen doesn’t know when to stop.
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I sleep every night with my socks on. I can’t remember a time I slept without socks. Even on the hottest summer nights. Probably since the day I was born. I always sleep with the door closed too.
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Thanks for thwarting my theory lol. I remember trying to sleep with socks a few nights as a kid when it was cold, but by the middle of the night I’d take them off because they were uncomfortable.
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1. What is a szn?
2. Uppercase G is a wonder – you obviously just haven’t hit your groove, but I have faith you will find it. Your Groove, I mean.
3. After reading this I’m no longer surprised about 2.
4. Hokey but I’m hooked. There has to be a specific term for this.
8. *side-eyes*
12. What is a scalloped potato?
15. I have never heard this song and now I hope I never do.
20.5 I don’t mind leaving the door open but I will NEVER wear socks to bed. What kind of rabid individual would think that was okay?
22. Cin-der-ell-a met her fell-a un-der-neath an um-bre-lla, by mis-take she kissed a snake, how many doc-tors did it take? 1…2…3…4…5…6… That was our one. We also used yours, but with a different start and end: Your mother and my mother were hanging out the clothes, my mother gave your mother a punch on the nose, what colour was the blood? *someone would then name a colour, eg green* G-R-E-E-N and out of this game you shall go whether you like it or not. Not because you’re smelly, not because you’re clean, just because you kissed a girl behind a dirty magazine!
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1. A szn is what the kidz these days write instead of the word “season”. I was trying to be hip with the lingo.
3. I draw the number 6 from the loop, but the G from the top. I confuse myself.
12. Scalloped potato is grossness on a plate. It’s just another way to make potatoes.
15. The song isn’t as creepy as it sounds in writing haha
22. There are probably thousands of songs worldwide to determine who was It in tag.
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34. When I imagine animals organising a social event, I think of Animal Farm and then it all goes downhill and ends in war and tragedy.
35. Ninjas would be even ninja-ier.
37. Sundry. Thundery if you say it fast enough.
44. Samsungs already have an iris unlock. I know this because that’s how Scrubs unlocks his phone; with his irises. The future is now.
47. What are woodchucks?
48.5 …or you’re in for a good time.
49. There’s no such thing as a stupid question.
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37. Thundery! Hahah
44. Woah! By all accounts, Samsung seems to have their stuff together. Apple just has the name value behind it I suppose.
47. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck would? Ever heard of that tongue twister? A woodchuck is a groundhog.
48.5 Depends who you say it to!
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Once again you did not disappoint. I am surprised there is any room for anything else in your head it is so full of nonsensical ramblings but your humor is spot on!!
Oh…I am a rebel, I wear socks AND slippers to bed, sometimes the door is closed and sometimes open depending on the mood.
Finally…thanks for the earworm!! NoT!! Now my friends and I are dancing till the dang song leaves!!
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Wait…..SLIPPERS?? That’s a new one.
You’re welcome for the dance party! And have no fear, I’ll never run out of nonsensical thoughts!
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I wear my socks at winter nights but i never leave the door open, because of our bright hallway light, and my sister who sings loudly with the worst voice ever
Loved the post by the way, i’m still dreaming of that all dressed chips, i googled it’s flavor and i might go and create a dipping sauce out of sour cream, barque, vinegar, ketchup and onions just to comfort my sorrow for not living in Canada :3
I always write banana with 3 n letters, then scratch the last one as i realize there’s no such thing
Hall to the donuts
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“and my sister who sings loudly with the worst voice ever” ahahaha I appreciate the honesty!
I’m telling you, All Dressed chips need to be a worldwide thing. People would be happier.
Hey you never know, if we start spelling “bananan”, it could become a thing eventually.
Thanks for reading!
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Ha ha! This is hilarious…I sometimes wear socks to bed…lol
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That’s quite daring of you lol. I tried it a few times when I was younger but it never felt comfortable.
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😜
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Hi there!!! Ok so I’ve missed you friend. I have some catching up to do here!!! Crap! But I’m back in action. So without further ado ( adew? A-do? I don’t know why I try so hard to be fancy with words that just sound like Doo-doo if you say them enough but anyways) ok SO SO SO MANY THINGS and I’m on the road here so I couldn’t take specific notes this time! But here are the ones that stood out to me:
-You watch stranger things?! Me too! I’m a few episodes in and I LIKE it but I’m not totally convinced about it all just yet but I’ll keep going because I have faith!
-On the planet of U.S.A. We have a MUCH simpler version of eenie meenie miney mo. After the if he hollers part blah blah it ends in “my mother said to pick the very best one and you are NOT it” which makes sense because moms here are assholes and WOULD say bully-Ish shit like that to their kids. Ugh.
-WOODCHUCK LIVES MATTER!!
-I have the same emotional complex with the whole “replacement song” issue. It’s bad. It causes anxiety. And then I have to hear like 80s freestyle to calm down.
-BESSY Is my spirit animal. But also? WHY ON EARTH are you “thinking about” what farm animals discuss? Should we be worried Paul?! Lol!!!!!
-Don’t get a new hobby. Am I only one who has advised against this? Just don’t. It’s a trick. It will Ruin you. Stick to your writing and NEVER get distracted or too caught up in another hobby like what’s happened to me! Focus Paul focus!
Lol!! Well this was fun.
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Adieu* ahahahaha. I kept saying Adieu-doo in my head as I read your whole comment. I’m 12 years old.
– Stranger Things is weird at first but if you embrace it you’ll like it! I wish nothing more than to be one of those people who says its overrated but I can’t lol.
– #WoodchucksLivesMatter – someone will be offended by this.
– Bessy! She’s a hit. Might have to do a fictional story about her. I always think about what animals are thinking! Been meaning to do a blog post about 4 dogs going for a walk and what each of them is thinking in their head. Like the dog at the bag is probably thinking “Caa..nt…bre…athe…Otis…far…ted.” Again, I’m 12.
– LOL I shall not be getting a new hobby. Thank you. I couldn’t think of anything anyways. Maybe I’ll just swing my arms for 30 seconds a day and call it exercise?
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Ps- I purposefully did not discuss my socks and door preferences. Your welcome 👹
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Oh no….
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Pig with me Paul, but I disagree on the onion ring part. I LOVE them!!
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I will look passed the onion ring comment and would be happy to pig with you!! Chef Paulo will cook.
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Hehe and Samwich will be the usual Guinea pig!
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3. I draw the number 6 starting from inside the loop. Apparently this is abnormal?
Ya weirdo! 🙂 HAHA.
4. Riverdale is getting a bit hokey, isn’t it?
I’m only on episode 7 or 8. I’m still in the un-hokey section. And can’t believe I haven’t had time to watch TV incessantly. I need a solid snow storm to hit. Now.
10. Can we go just one Wednesday without someone mentioning that it’s “Hump Day”? You don’t think we know by now?
hahaha. TRUUU.
15. In the song, “Stroke Me” by The Squire, I always thought the lyrics were, “Something’s cooking” but they are actually, “Stroke me, stroke me.”
“Living like a lover with a red iPhone…” that’s mine. From Pour Some Sugar On Me (We’ve been over this somehow – or in my dreams?)
19. I don’t know who invented the couch, but they’re a genius.
YES. Yes they are!
20. People who wear their socks to sleep are probably the same people who are okay with sleeping with the door open.
I used to sleep with the door slightly ajar. Not fully open, that freaks me out. But, I have to leave space for Zero to come & go. Am I a weird one?
28. I’ve never been in a hammock. I don’t think I’d ever get off if I were to ever get on.
NEVER? luaP!
30. I want a new hobby. Something small and simple and beneficial. Last year my “new hobby” was solving Sudoku puzzles. The year before that, it was donuts.
DONUTS! Ugh, I wish you could try a donut from my favorite shop here.
32. I’m just here to make the world a more observant place. And if no one notices me, I’ll have proven that my cause is worthy.
Damn. Touche.
38. Why can’t we all agree to not drive like maniacs?
Yeah, coulda saved me a Thanksgiving weekend accident. UUUUUGH.
45. Why be Cookie Monster for Halloween when you can be Cookie Monster every day?
Oh my goodness. THIS is everything. hahaha.
I hope these comments are enjoyable, and not annoying. or too much.
miss you!
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3. But have you ever tried drawing the number 6 starting from inside the loop? It’s life changing.
15. Definitely in your dreams haha
20. Slightly ajar is even worse than all the way open! Someone could be staring in at you the whole time you’re sleeping!!!
28. Ok. It’s not like I’ve declined going on a hammock. I’ve just never been in a situation where a hammock is present and I can go sit/lay in it.
45. COOOKIEE.
Oh, just kidding about #15 btw, we totally talked about it before.
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16. These are a pain in my…neck. I wait for the “skip after 5 seconds” button, and some don’t even have those and we have to watch the whole thing lol!
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I found a way to work around those ones! If it’s a 30 second ad, I’ll hit refresh and most of the time the new ad is 15 seconds or less, or has a skip after 5 seconds button. In the end, I save myself about 15 seconds, but its better than sitting for 30. Ugh.
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