10 Things I Thought Were True When I Was A Kid

Oh, to be a kid again. Those were the days when the only questions people asked you were related to your age, height, grade, or number of teeth missing from your mouth. All of them were math questions, too. It’s amazing so many people grew up to hate math. Is that a strong positive correlation I smell?

But when you’re a kid, you’re naive. You don’t understand everything. You don’t know a lot. You come to conclusions without giving them much thought. At least I did.

When I was a kid, there were things I thought were true. It wasn’t until I got older that I realized how wrong I was about most of those things.

Insert blurb about how kids these days are technological wizards and have mastered social media before learning how to do long division. Maybe kids these days are actually smarter than we were? Nahhhhh

Here is my list of things I thought were true when I was a kid.

1. In movies and TV shows, when they had a flashback to a character’s childhood, I thought the child actor was the same person as the adult actor, and they had taken years off of filming just so the child could grow up.

I didn’t know the child actor was a completely different person. The child always had the same hair colour as the adult, how was I to know they were two different people?

FRAUD!

2. I thought actors didn’t actually kiss each other.

I assumed they put a piece of saran wrap between their mouths and kissed each other through that. Then they’d edit out the saran wrap in post-production. How smart is that, though?

I thought it was wrong for married people to kiss people that weren’t their spouse, even if they were acting. Excuse me for having morals?

3. I thought adults always wrote in cursive; kids did not. I also thought that part of knowing that you were growing up was when you transitioned full-time into the world of cursive writing.

When I got to Grade 7, the teacher told us to write our notes in cursive. This made me think that printing was for children and that I was crossing over into the grown-up world.

Thankfully, the cursive writing didn’t last long and I was back to printing my letters like the child that I was. and still am, since I don’t use cursive for anything other than my signature.

4. I thought three minutes was a really long time.

In elementary school, we had to give a speech in front of the class. It had to be between three to five minutes in length. Three minutes felt like an eternity. Five minutes felt like two eternities. Two minutes and forty three seconds felt like “long enough”, until you stopped talking and were deducted marks for being 17 seconds short.

5. I thought $10 was a weekly salary that adults earned at work.

The odd time, I would do some chores around the house and my mom would pay me a dime. Or if it was a big task, like windexing a window, I would get a quarter! I thought I was rich. So in my little brain, $10 felt like the jackpot.

Maybe this is why I’ve always thought I was meant for a different era.

Sorry, just doing some self-discovery mid-blog post. Onto the next one!

6. I thought Santa Claus had my mom’s handwriting.

The tags on my gifts from Santa always looked like they were written by my mom. But I never thought that she actually wrote them. I just figured they had the same writing. All adults have the same writing, right?

I’ve since learned that Santa and my mom draw the letter “A” differently. So no, it was not my mom’s writing on those gifts from Santa.

7. I thought kids in elementary school were really old.

When I was five-years-old, I remember playing basketball in the hallways at school. There was a little (huge) basketball net set up for the kids in senior kindergarten to play with during play time.

(Reminisce over play time for 10 seconds).

One day, little Paul stood there as a bunch of older kids walked by, stared, and made complimentary comments towards me. From my perspective, they were giants. Very old and mature.

Even as I moved up a few grades, I still thought the kids in Grade 7 and 8 were really old. They looked like adults! Some of them had hair on their legs!

8. I thought Grade 8 was going to be extremely hard.

In June, it always got really hot in the classrooms at school. So when the Grade 8’s were on their three-day field trip to “wherever”, younger grades would go occupy their classrooms because they were in the air conditioned part of the school.

And when we sat at their desks, I remember seeing a million and one things crammed inside of them. More books, papers, and supplies than a Staples store. I thought I was doomed. The books were thick. It looked like so much work.

9. I thought the race commentators for Formula One were saying “Cometry Box”.

I knew that people had accents. I didn’t know that it would cause them to say words differently than I was used to. These British commentators always referenced the “Cometry Box”. I never even second guessed it, or asked what a “Cometry Box” was.

It wasn’t until about three years ago that I realized they were actually saying “Commentary Box” – the place where they sit and do play-by-play for the race.

Yes, I was 21-years-old when I finally figured it out. Fight me.

10. I thought “Pull” was actually a third goalie in hockey video games.

Apparently, it wasn’t. I was told that every hockey team had “Pull” as a third goalie, just in case the first two got injured. So, I put “Pull” in net to give him some playing time. The other team came down the ice and shot the puck into my empty net. I screamed, “Where’s my goalie!?!? Where’s Pull!?!?”

And that’s my list. I was a naive kid, but weren’t we all?

In the comments below, share with me some things you thought were true when you were a kid! And then we’ll laugh at them together!

Advertisements

About Paul

This is the part where I'm supposed to write something interesting about myself and you'll read it and think, "That's not that interesting." So let's not do that and just think about pizza instead, on the count of three. One, two, three. Donuts. Now, wasn't that interesting?
This entry was posted in Life and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

60 Responses to 10 Things I Thought Were True When I Was A Kid

  1. I’m just wondering how you remembered all of these things. I thought some of these things too and I always lived for the day I turned 21. Thought that was the coolest age anyone could ever be. Well it ended up being the year I got married and since I’m still happily married, I guess I was right! Lol…

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Em says:

    Um, I totally hoped that they weren’t actually kissing. That’s like my top reason for not wanting to ever act… I also didn’t realize that the Chick-fil-a logo has a chicken around the C. I don’t know, I just thought it was deformed or something until like last year.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I still think three minutes is a long time! Is that bad? Sometimes when I’m in a particularly awkward situation 60 seconds can be a bit much haha!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Julia McGeown says:

    Hilarious! You made me laugh! I love it!

    Like

  5. Squid says:

    I still have a hard time not believing #1!!
    You have no idea how many things I’m finally realizing aren’t true as I am about to turn 16, but I cannot think of any examples. If I think of any, I’ll send you a telepathic message! If you have any more realizations, that was me. You’re welcome.
    Squid

    Liked by 1 person

  6. rebbit7 says:

    #6 Haha! Like you, I believed #1 and #2 when I was a kid. Another thing I had believed was that, according to what my friend recounted, if one drank Coca-Cola, it was like drinking alcohol. Basically, I thought Coca-Cola was alcohol! So when I was given it and drank some of it, I panicked and went to the bathroom to rinse out my mouth. ‘Cause underage drinking is bad for you, right? 😉

    Liked by 2 people

  7. peckapalooza says:

    My mom got clever with her Santa Claus notes, writing with her left hand instead of her dominant right.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. casondra2rey says:

    Lol so cute!! The thing kids really think about. Interesting. U got me thinking

    Liked by 1 person

  9. anshurao says:

    I thought brothers and sisters got married to each other .

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Am I Thirty? says:

    Haha this was cute. When I was little, I always used to think that the cars in front of us when my dad was driving were following us. I would genuinely get scared if they made a few turns and then so did we. Again these were the cars in FRONT of us.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Paul says:

      Hahaha the cars in front of you were following you. Oh that’s good. In reality, you were the ones following them. Might wanna ask your dad a few questions about that….lol

      Like

  11. Jess says:

    1.) When the school nurse would do her yearly checkup on the students and she used that hair separator thing on my head, I didn’t realize that she was checking for lice. I had no idea that bugs could actually live in my hair.
    2.) I thought that sex was just kissing until my first health class in like, seventh grade where we got down to the nitty gritty. The sex scenes in movies always just showed the actors kissing, which then horrified me when a boy at school said he wanted to kiss me. I ran away with fear.
    3.) I thought the exact same thing about child actors and flashbacks, on top of the idea that the characters in those movies were real. So when I saw Leo DiCaprio kissing another woman in a different movie who was not Kate Winslet, I was like, “WHAT ON EARTH IS HE DOING!?”

    Liked by 1 person

    • Paul says:

      We never even had a school nurse! If you were sick you would go lie down in the main office on a table and they’d put one ice cube in a bag if you hurt yourself. One ice cube.
      As for number 2, I thought the same thing! Which I think is the reason why I didn’t believe actors were actually kissing. Don’t need a TLC show on our hands here.
      Kids don’t understand movies are fake. This is probably why there are so many animated things for kids because it’s not like they go outside and see animated people (then again they don’t go outside in the first place).

      Liked by 1 person

  12. You weren’t too bright were you? I’m kidding!! Loved your list.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Pingback: 3 More Things I Thought Were True When I Was A Kid | The Captain's Speech

  14. Little Rants says:

    I actually thought fat was cute.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. hmekeel says:

    I’ve never heard of the Saran Wrap thing. That is funny! When I was little, for some reason I thought below your skin was a layer of lettuce. No organs or bones or blood. Just thought we were all cabbage inside.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Barb Knowles says:

    On highways, sometimes at a toll booth, instead of a human from whom we could take the ticket and say “Have a good day,” there would be a large box. The driver would press a button and a ticket would magically appear. I thought there was a person sitting inside the big box feeding tickets through the opening. N-a-i-v-e.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Barb Knowles says:

    After my health hiatus I have a new post up. Just sayin’.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Lindsey says:

    I thought cursive was the only writing adults did, and I was so offended when I got to fourth grade and found out the “cursive license” I got in third grade meant ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. Still bitter… Lol

    Liked by 1 person

    • Paul says:

      Haha the “cursive license”. That must’ve been devastating. I remember in Grade 1 I wrote the letter “a” but put a little loop on the end of it, like the cursive letter “a” and my teacher told me I wasn’t allowed to do that yet.

      Like

  19. yarluna19 says:

    I thought that cartoons really consisted of tiny adults squeezing into small costumes.
    Ex. Tom and Jerry were really just adults running around dressed as a cat and mouse…
    The logic of a 5 yr old.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Paul says:

      Haha that’s cute. I remember when I was that age at my local mall there was a Tomas the Tank Engine display set up where you could sit inside and take a picture. I wondered why it wasn’t talking like on TV…

      Liked by 1 person

  20. Leen says:

    Ookay, this was fun to read! Great post!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s