Tell Me When

I do not know when but it was not then
that I realized you were really there
maybe sitting in my leather chair
as I lay on the floor by the door
praying that there would be something more
and with every cry was a wonder why
the footsteps on the other side got louder
before they slowly started to die
allowing only a cold breeze to come under
making me wonder if I would ever escape that blunder

And it was more of a command
that you reach down and grab my hand
to bring me through to round two
on the other side of the door
with my two feet planted on the floor
looking at what I always wanted to see
a new beginning that included me
in a world where we did not bicker
moving quicker and quicker
until there was nothing left but a flicker

But now I see what you did for me
how it was as simple as counting to three
and climbing a tree to feel alive and free
away from the ground that held me near
I could not handle another fear
so when the knock at the door finally came
nothing was ever the same
all the pain you took away
left a large debt for the day
still impossible to repay

Through it all I never said thank you
or even knew why it was so easy
to wake up without feeling queasy
it became a routine
like adding gravy to poutine
there was a comfort I never thought I would find
with a dozen hearts so kind I was in a bind
such a thought only left me blind
I was a fool to think it would last
unaware it could end so fast

Now I sit on the floor by the door once more
my heart is a drum expecting something to come
counting past my thumb never felt so numb
but my faith in you will never leave
because the rocks tell me to believe
I know you are here sitting in the chair so near
waiting for me to look up and grab your hand
trusting in everything you have planned
so can we do what we did back then
the part where you pick a time but not tell me when.