My Keyboard Is Hot Lava

From mid-March to mid-June, I was posting almost every single day. Ideas were popping up in my head on an hourly basis. I always had something up my sleeve. My arm. I always had something to write about next.

Everything flowed from my brain to my fingertips. I didn’t have to think. I just had to sit in front of my laptop and my body would take care of the rest. I was on autopilot.

During that time, I became really close with a bunch of other bloggers. We would have our daily conversation in the comments section and take turns making each other smile. It was fun. It was comfortable. It was always a highlight of my day.

Then life got in the way and I published two posts in the span of two months. I had hinted that I would be taking a break from blogging for a bit, but I thought I would post more than I did.

I never anticipated that people would care. I never thought that if I didn’t post something, someone on the other side of the world would feel like something was missing in their life. I never anticipated receiving comments and emails from bloggers, asking me where I was and if I was okay.

Honestly, that was pretty cool. I’ve always believed that the blogging community is different and that proved it to me.

Trust me when I tell you that for the last two months, when I wasn’t posting on a regular basis or even reading other blogs, it was eating away at me. I felt terrible. I felt like I had left the dinner table and stormed out the front door.

You’re all picturing that right now, I’m sure. Don’t worry, the dinner wasn’t anything special. If it was, I would’ve finished eating first, then stormed off. You all know that.

If you posted something in the last two months and normally receive a like or comment from me, and didn’t, well then I’m sorry. I was ignoring you. It’s not you, it’s me. That line applies here, right?

That being said…I’m back.

Three people are cheering.

I am so anxious to start blogging again.

Except, I have one small major problem, and about 65 minor problems. I’ll spare you the minor problems. The major problem is I don’t know what to say. For the last ten days I’ve been trying to think of something to write about and all I could muster up was one post.

After I published that post I felt like a kid returning to school after being away sick for a week. You all know the feeling. Everyone stares at you and makes it sound like you just missed out on the best week of school ever. Oh, and you have a lot of homework to catch up on.

I hate to admit it, but it might take me a while to get back into my blogging groove. I’m lacking ideas. I’m lacking witty quips. I’m lacking inspiration. I have an overabundance of perspiration, however.

Was that a witty quip, or the truth? Both.

Just when I think I have something I want to write about, I get to the part where I actually have to start typing and nothing comes out. It’s as if my fingers think the keyboard is hot lava. Just my luck. Who put hot lava on my keyboard?

I’ve been gone for so long and now that I’m back, I can’t produce anything. It’s frustrating. You would think that after two months I would have a million ideas. I don’t. I just don’t.

And I know there are people who are dying to read new things from me. And by “people”, I mean three, maybe four.

I’ve set the bar so unnecessarily high for myself when it comes to this blog. My goal is to make every post better than the last. I put that line on my About Me page so it must be true.

Hopefully I can find a way to remove the hot lava from my keyboard so my brain can once again pump some high quality comedic ideas from my brain to my fingertips for all of you to enjoy.

Until then, have some patience, eat some pizza, and allow me to stalk your blog posts from the last two months!

And for those of you I know in real life, who aren’t bloggers but still read my blog…HI. Leave a comment some time. It’ll be fun and hopefully awkward.

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About Paul

This is the part where I'm supposed to write something interesting about myself and you'll read it and think, "That's not that interesting." So let's not do that and just think about pizza instead, on the count of three. One, two, three. Donuts. Now, wasn't that interesting?
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61 Responses to My Keyboard Is Hot Lava

  1. datingflops says:

    I, for one will cheer that you are back. It was quiet , very quiet. Either that or I need to find new people to follow. I understand about having nothing to write about, I went through that in the past month and am only now, getting back to some sort of regularity in posting.

    I’m sure you will think of something!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. welcome back……….perhaps try making a list, random stuff that pops into your head, a strange shop sign or funny street sign….something you can comment on briefly and go from there. I have a got to list when my brain refuses to work! Sometimes it helps, and then sometimes it doesn’t

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Paulo is back, well was. Yes I read the last post 😛 😀 I post every freakin’ dar and I still don’t have the hang of it totally, so I know what you feel, a little.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Erin S. says:

    I am excited you’re back. WordPress was missing a bit of wit, and pizza references.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I can relate to this post so much! I was also inactive the time you were gone, and have still not returned properly. But now that you’re back, good luck for your future posts!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. jasinrockgod says:

    Welcome back! I missed reading you…

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Barb Knowles says:

    Funny that you wrote this, because I barely wrote this summer, after also having blogged many times a week leading up to the summer. And yesterday I wrote in a comment “I’m baaaaaack.” While I wasn’t posting a lot (read: almost never) I did look for you. And I’m looking forward to you posting frequently again. It doesn’t have to be great. Just making the connection to us makes my smile. By the way, you can start reading and liking my posts starting today, too. Except not this minute because I haven’t posted my latest yet haha.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Squid says:

    I’m so glad you’re back! I missed your posts in my reader, they always made me laugh. 🙂 Don’t worry about inspiration and lava, just wear asbestos gloves and type the randomest things. We won’t care. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Issa says:

    Awwwww so touchy….hahaha sorry men I had to say it

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Issa says:

    You had to say eat pizza…..that’s your wit right there

    Liked by 1 person

  11. James says:

    Thing is, you just wrote an awesome post about having nothing to write about, so I think your worries are misplaced.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. rebbit7 says:

    Welcome back! I might be hard to get back into the swing of things after a two-month hiatus, but hopefully the creative juices will kick in again. Take your time; we’ll be here!

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Ashley says:

    I’m glad you’re back. I enjoy your posts.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Dream it Alive says:

    Now 4 are cheering with news of your return! Glad to see you’re back!

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Anonymous says:

    Glad to hear that you are back! And awfully glad that nothing is wrong. Yes, your posts do add a special something to the day. I look forward to reading your posts because they always make me smile and chuckle a little. Thanks for brightening up my day! And I’m sure those ideas will be flowing soon.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Jessie Reyna says:

    Don’t feel too bad! Overall, everyone was kind of off the grid for summer so I’m excited for not only you but everyone else to get back into the groove!

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Paul, as your doctor (and partner in many a nefarious business scheme) I can tellz you now, zat you are zuffering from za acute anxiety known as za “Absentbloggerworriedalotitis” and uh yes, I knows zis is a big made up Latin word used only by quasi European—alzo… I tend to sink of myselfz as a quasi (that’s fake for) German—doctor. However, I prescribe a heavy dose of za writing on za wall kind of blogging. And in a noze time at all, you’ll be up onz your zeat in front of za keyboard pounding away on yet anozah blog ah post (all of za sudden, I zink I have fallen into za Italian accent instead), uoont you will not be able to read much more of zis without going za cross eyed. And zen I will haz to poze az zome kind of oculist… az opposed to zome kind of za quack. ZO, GET WRITING AND ZAVE YOURZELF FROM MORE OF ZIS KIND OF ZA READING!

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Glad you’re back! Your witty posts always inspire me to get to work and write about SOMETHING that’s hopefully funny.

    US Lifestyle Blog // http://www.rebekahkoontzsite.com

    Liked by 1 person

  19. melodysgt says:

    Holy Crap, so many comments! I am so jealous but then I tend to write not that funny posts. Did I miss you? Well, since I am commenting I guess I did and welcome back. Hit the keyboard with the fire extinguisher and make all these great people happy, why don’t ya! I may not read every one of your posts but I always enjoy the ones I do. Nice to see you, Paul.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. hmekeel says:

    I’ve felt the same way lately, and it’s frustrating! And you can’t push yourself or you might sacrifice quality of your content. I can tell I have a good idea when it comes from no where and hits me in the head like a brick or hot pizza. I would like to get hit with a pizza.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. anxietybug88 says:

    Yo, dawg. I hope I’m one of those three or four people, because I’ve greatly missed your witty quips and tales of near-death experiences with flies.

    I know what you mean about the blogging groove. It’s like the English language has all of a sudden jumped off the proverbial cliff of your brain, and you have to fish it back out of the drink. Heck, I have a degree in English/Creative Writing, and yesterday was one of the worst days of writer’s block I’ve had in awhile. Keep at it! The more you write, the easier the words will come to you.

    P.S. Still waiting on that pizza. I haven’t eaten since we last spoke in anticipation of the cheesy deliciousness of pizza with a side of breadsticks. I think you owe me breadsticks.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Paul says:

      You were one of the three or four people haha. I’ve come to realize that writing can either be the easiest thing in the world, or the hardest. And I think my pizza and breadsticks probably got lost in the mail? Or the delivery man ate them. It is a long way…

      Liked by 1 person

  22. casondra2rey says:

    I haven’t had nearly as long as a running streak as you but I definitely understand the dry spell stage (currently going through it) but hey that’s life. Some days we are interesting and others we aren’t. You definitely were missed. I take solace in my own break knowing that I wasn’t missing any of your witty posts. Glad you didn’t stay away forever. lol

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Hi, Paul. You know, if you want something to inspire witticisms all you have to do is check out anything to do with the presidential hopefuls. that is always a barrel of laughs and a never-ending source of materials for sarcasm.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. amorefado says:

    Glad you’re back!!! I’ve been MIA too :\ *guilty*

    Liked by 1 person

  25. Liz says:

    Say anything. Your brain is interesting and your writing if fluid. I would read your blog posts if they were merely you typing the random thoughts that come to mind… 🙂 As for blogger’s block, I hear you loud and clear! A million ideas and no time or an empty schedule and zero inspiration. The struggle, as they say, is real.

    Liked by 1 person

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