Exchanging Emails With My 10-Year-Old Self

This is a twist on the whole “write a letter to your former self” thing that has been going on for a while. To make this easier to understand, my 10-year-old self will be replying in bold. Enjoy.

Dear Paul,
Ha, I called you “Dear”. You don’t know me yet, but you will! Alright, this sounds creepy. I’m you in the future. Reply to me. Thanks.

Paul,
You got the wrong email. You sent that to your future self. You don’t want to talk to me yet. Trust me. 

Dear Paul,
Ha, I called you “Dear”. You don’t know me yet, but you will! Yup, still creepy. I’m you in the future. Reply to me. Thanks.

My parents told me not to talk to strangers, but you don’t seem like a stranger. What year are you writing me from?

I’m not a stranger! It is currently 2015. We have flying cars, instapizza, and talking dogs. How are you doing? How’s Grade Five treating you?

INSTAPIZZA? That sounds like pizza that is instantaneously made right in front of you within seconds! Flying cars don’t impress me. We all knew they were coming. Talking dogs are on TV all the time. Scooby Doo. Hello? You’re so lame.

Grade Five is good. Guess what! I got a brand new hockey jersey! It’s so cool. And I think I made a best friend at recess the other day. We talked for ten minutes and agreed on everything. I hear that’s rare.

Man, your writing skills are top notch for a 10-year-old. You’re right! Instapizza is exactly how you described it. A new hockey jersey? No way! I would’ve never guessed. As for that best friend of yours, he’ll still be around in 2015. You guys will go to Pizza Hut a lot.

I love Pizza Hut! Hey Paul, guess what!

You’re playing softball again in the summer?

Yeah! How’d you know? 

I’m you, idiot!

Oh yeah, well you’re a nincompoop!

Nincompoop, great word. Good insult, Paul! So hey, do you like playing softball?

I love it! I’m always the first one there practising with Dad. I always mess up during the game though. I always drop the ball or it let it go by me. I feel like I’m letting the team down.

Oh, don’t worry about that stuff. Everyone makes mistakes. Just have fun. You’re a great pitcher, remember? And you never strike out when you’re batting. Don’t sweat the small stuff, you smell bad enough as it is!

Hey! Are you saying I smell? Dad says that to me every time we drive home. He rolls down the windows. I thought he was joking, though. Can you tell me if I’ll ever win a championship?

I can’t tell you that. Sorry. All I can say is have fun, work hard, expect nothing, and good things will happen.

You sound like Oprah. 

Good. Oprah owns half the universe.

She does?

O, she does. See what I did there? Hey, what did you do today?

Paul, you’re not funny. I woke up. Ate breakfast. Got dressed. Went to school. Got out of the car. Walked onto the playground. Saw my friends. Heard the bell ring. Lined up. Went to class. Stood for the national anthem. Hey, our national anthem is called “O Canada”, does Oprah own that too? And then I sat down. And then I…

Based on how long it’s taking you to reply, I can tell you’re writing a novel.

Sorry.

No, Oprah does not own our national anthem. Now give me a brief version of what you did today.

I went to school. Came home. Went outside and played road hockey with the kids on the street. Came inside and had dinner. Then I watched some cartoons. Then I did my homework. Now I’m talking to myself in the future. You’re lucky there isn’t a hockey game on tonight.

Oh how I wish I were you right now. That sounds great. What did you have for dinner?

Pizza.

Good boy.

Hey, Paul?

Yeah, Paul?

What are the next 14 years of my life going to be like? I’m worried.

Don’t be worried. Great things are going to happen. There will be ups and downs, I won’t lie. You will find yourself and then lose yourself, many times. The friends you currently play with at recess won’t be around in 14 years, which is fine. Your current best friend will still be there.

You’ll also make a lot of good friends in high school. And then SPOILER ALERT you’ll go off to university. I won’t tell you which one. It’s pretty cool how you figure out which school you want to go to, I won’t ruin that for you.

There, you’ll meet a second family. People you don’t even know exist. They are out there somewhere, growing up in a different city, but your paths will cross eventually.

When you graduate, well, I’ll leave that alone for now. You don’t need to know about life after graduation just yet.

Hold on, what does “SPOILER ALERT” mean? Where are these terms coming from? How can I trust you that I’m going to have an entirely different group of friends in the future? You’re telling me, the kids that don’t pass me the soccer ball at recess, aren’t going to be in my life in 14 years?

This is all too much. And what happens after I completely finish school? Then what? 

Paul, just be a kid. Enjoy being a kid. You don’t get to be that age forever. You’re going to grow up faster than you think. Pretty soon you won’t have to raise your hand and ask to go to the washroom. You’ll just go, because you can.

After you finish school, things will be different. Things will be tougher. Just promise me you won’t give up. Don’t ever give up.

I won’t give up. Am I going to be okay?

Yes, you are.

Then so will you, Paul. So will you.