20 Quotes

Over the last few years and few minutes, I have come up with 20 quotes that you can use for humour, inspiration, motivation, or nothing at all. Feel free to give me credit if you steal them. Or not. Your choice! If some of these quotes already exist, or some variation of them exist, I had no idea. Don’t yell at me.

If you can’t knock their socks off, they’re already barefoot.

They say if you’re not first, you’re last. Then why do they have a podium at the Olympics?

You can’t force someone to apologize to you.

Everyone is always after the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, but how are we supposed to know which end of the rainbow it’s at?

Google will always be there for you, except when you’re writing an exam.

Keep your friends close and your enemies on Facebook.

When the music stops, sit down.

If you come to a fork in the road, make sure it doesn’t slash your tires.

Never talk about someone behind their back, they’ll probably hear you.

Don’t be intimidated by others. They flip their pillow over to the cold side just like you do.

There is no such thing as a stupid question. Just kidding.

When life gives you ice, go skating.

If you’re lost, find yourself, and then find what you’re looking for.

Life is a team sport.

Friends are like a sandwich. If you put too many things in the bun, eventually some fall out.

Yesterday prepares you for today which prepares you for tomorrow.

Everyone has to venture off on their own eventually. Bananas call this a “banana split.” Humans call this “moving out.”

Life is hard; sit on a couch.

Never throw in the towel, you’ll need it to wipe the sweat from all your hard work.

If you can’t remember something, it’s not important.