I can’t help but feel like Facebook just wants to be loved. And when it doesn’t feel loved, it starts to feel self-conscious and neglected. It will never express its true feelings. No. That would hurt too much. Instead, it sends subliminal messages like a high school student. How, you ask? Through sponsored polls.
What is a sponsored poll? Go on Facebook and you’ll see them. They hang out on the side of the news feed. Lately the polls have taken a drastic turn. A turn for what? I don’t know. Just a drastic turn.
I’m getting an overwhelming feeling that Facebook thinks it’s losing me, but they don’t want to come right out and ask.
Facebook is trying to make the world a better place? Huh? How? By forcing people to compare their life to their friends? Sorry. I should rephrase that last sentence. It should read: By forcing people to compare their life to people they haven’t had any contact with in the last five years?
Yeah, that’s more like it.
Are they hoping that I strongly agree, just to satisfy their ego? Just so they know I’m committed to them? I don’t know. Is Facebook really trying to make the world a better place? They will say yes. It’s users will probably say no.
Since when is it up to social media to make the world better, anyway?
What about this one? Its best days are ahead? I don’t know. For me, Facebook’s heyday was 2011-2013. Ever since then, it seems to have died down. My news feed is occupied by posts from pages, more than posts from people. But hey, the Farmville requests have died! If only I could say the same for Candy Crush Saga. Stop it, friends.
Again, this poll just makes me think they want validation.
Man, they might as well ask, “Are you seeing someone else.” Yes, and her name is Twitter. She’s lovely. I think Twitter has passed Facebook in my social media rankings. Twitter makes me feel smarter, Facebook just makes me feel. STOP ASKING ME IF I LIKE A POST.
At least on Twitter I can get news from the world. Facebook just updates me on people I haven’t talked to since high school. And that’s no disrespect to them, it’s just the truth. I have 366 friends on Facebook. There are people with way more friends than that. Do we keep in touch with all of them? Nope. Not a chance.
See, now Facebook has caught on that I’m cheating on them with someone else and wants to know if I still, for lack of a better word, like them. By the way, I find it amusing that Facebook is referring to itself in third person for all of these polls. Maybe they have a separate company conducting them, who knows. I find it comical.
This might be my favourite. It’s the equivalent to, “I’ve been calling and texting you all week and you didn’t respond.” I don’t answer these polls on Facebook. I just leave them there. Apparently they figured that out and are wondering if I even saw them.
Yeah, I saw them. I’m just not answering.
I’m wondering what poll is coming next.
“Does this layout make Facebook look fat?”
“Is there anything Facebook can do to make you stop seeing Twitter?”
I mean, the possibilities are endless. I always thought that writing fortunes for fortune cookies would be an amazing job. Now I’m thinking that creating poll questions on Facebook might be even better.
Earth to Facebook, people are getting tired of you. Mainly because we don’t like people as much as you think we do. Sure, we have our friends. But that person we met once, a few years ago, at the place, by the thing, for 5 minutes, who posts three times a day, can start to bug us.
Sure, we can unfriend them, but then we just accept a friend request the next week from someone who fits the same profile. But since we met them a day ago, we have to put in some time before we can justify unfriending them.
It’s all very messed up.
Will I ever leave Facebook? I don’t know if I can. The only way I talk to some people is through Faceboook Messages. If I quit, it’s not like I have MSN as a fall back plan. Man, I miss those days.
Also, I’m invested in too many poke wars to give up now.
Like it or not.